A long walk by herself was due.... she liked them best that way!! an endless road.... with just the light of the stars....silence filling the air with pure bliss!! the lonely road brought back memories of her past which were very depressing!! roads which were filled with too much sorrow!!! roads one hates to travel on !!!but theres something about the silence that drew her closer to it!!! she had this attachement with nature..... it was a very strong bond... the moon ,the stars ,the rain..... her feelings came flowing out to those far away bodies!!to bodies that she felt wouldnt laugh at her feelings.... wouldnt judge her for who she is!!! her greatest fear!!! back then... she was happy with that bond itself... she felt she didnt deserve any better!!! people mistook her carefree attitude for pride!! this hurt her... hurt her bad!!! she felt rejected and all alone!!!
Then suddenly out of the blue something happened..... a ray of light shined upon her... into her life... enlightening those dark thoughts and forcing them away!!! it transformed her!!!filled her life with love and warmth!!! she learnt the power of love.... its extent... its effect!!!! she learnt to care for others.... more than oneself... to become selfless!!! a lot of people liked her... loved actually!she was then happy in life.... she was excited... crack and loony!!! she began to smile and jump around!! her goofiness was never ending!!! that soon became her trademark!!! her temper didnt seem to bother them.... they loved her inspite of it!!! she now had the inspiration to conquer her temper!!! now had inspiration to fight the mind games in her head!!!
she was beginning to realise at longlast... she meant something to some people!!!! they might be a very few in number.... but enough for her to realise... shes not that bad!!! infact.... shes nice!!! she thought that this feeling needed to be spread.... well she started by telling everyone she loved.... that she did!!! started by letting them know she cared.... and their existance meant something to her!!!! she felt an invisible knot in her head loosen..... she had changed!!! she had become someone she had only imagined!!! her life a life she thought possible only in dreams!!!
she was.... is... and probably will always be me!!! yes lil ol me!! i am what i am!!! and i wish i grow to love myself more... cause thats how it should be!!! it took me a long walk on a sometimes lonely road to reach home..... to reach this stage!!! NOW my road aint lonely anymore..... its bustling with joy,love and peace..... not always huh.... but well with so much of it.... that im learning to be strong and deal with anything thats thrown at me!!! things happen for a reason.... maybe those things happened to help shape me.... they definetly made me who i am today.... and however horrible they were then and the thoughts of them now are..... they made me a better person!!! even now... i share that deep connection with nature!!! so i guess some part of us never changes.... we just grow with every experience!!!! Its been a long walk.... and i guess now... im finally home!!!! ahh and its good to be home!!!