I watched tons of people colour themselves and their lives from the safe confines of the bars of my window today. It pleased me to see the sparkle in their eyes; their joyful screams of surprise when spurts of water hit them. But it did not tempt me to go out and join them, not even once. I enjoyed watching them from the distance I had put between us.
Hours later, I stood at the same window wondering how I had gotten here. How my life had become something I lived so differently from everyone else around me. Have I become so damn serious that I couldn’t go out there and just have some mindless fun? Have I become so uptight that the only joys I get are from working? I have no damn clue.
I am told by Lucas Scott in One Tree Hill that there are several moments in our life when our life goes terribly off course. It is about fighting to get it back on the right track. But what if what I perceive today as an aberration is indeed not.
I step away from the window, putting more distance between the Asian College of Journalism and me. And as I walk towards the mirror contemplating about the past ten months, I realise life is not about what I do, but who I do it with. The void in my life that is still empty after these months will probably stay that way for a long time to come. Somebody, somewhere, at some point of time will probably fill them. Until then, I can do what I like to do and be happy. Even if it is watching from the window.