Friday, February 24, 2012

Friends and acquaintances

I think I don't make friends very easily. Being an introvert, I take time to let my guard down. But a couple of times in my life, a few friendships were natural and barely took any effort from my end. I remember the conversation with J never stopped flowing, after we started talking. People around us couldn't believe that we had gotten so close, in such little time. Suddenly, we both (who are otherwise not so big on talking) were constantly chattering to each other. The comfort I shared with her, I never really found elsewhere. There was indeed something so relaxing and calming about conversations with her. Even now, the relationship is just as comfortable as it was when it began. It is just as fascinating, too.
I just assumed I got lucky with her as such an easy relationship had never presented itself to me before. I always had to work hard to make it work. But recently, I encountered another wonderful woman. I would like to like her AJ, similar to MJ which she would like I am sure. My friendship with her got off to a smooth start and it is still smooth. I like her personality and love her company. Too soon to tell, many would say. But I have a good feeling about her. Just like I had a wonderful feeling about J.
This got me thinking if I indeed I had judged myself all wrong and that I could make friends easily. Then I remembered what Richard Bach says in Illusions, "Your friends will know you better in the first minute you meet than your acquaintances will know you in a thousand years."

11 comments:

R-A-J said...

Interesting post, Srinidhi..

I'm told tht I'm an extrovert but I hv very few friends I cud call at the middle of the night (of course, its another story that I still call a lot of 'em in the middle of the night n ask them if they were sleeping! If I they say they were, I say "Ok,then carry on!" n put down the phone! Usually kills them! :) ) but my point being that its only a handful whom I can call as my really gud friends... maybe its a case with everyone, I suppose...

Love the last line, Srinidhi.. very profound n beautiful...

Sinduja said...

Srinidhi, thank god for the term 'introvert' and its scientific reputation in psychology as a personality type. If not for it, I would have thought something was seriously wrong with me and tried to change it. Now, looking back, I wonder if probably I should have changed this nature of mine.

I totally understand the part about letting the guard down. Somehow it seems more tough than the rest to get excited and show the excitement for topics which our minds fail to register as interesting - which includes 90% of what is usually spoken around. Not that we are the wise ones but sometimes makes us wonder why we need to be so serious.

Yet the same seriousness effortlessly transforms into comfort and even mischief with a few and with them we are able to be someone we are not usually. I don't know the reason behind this but I would only say, hold these people tight; never ever let them go! :)

Psych Babbler™ said...

I'm with you Nids. I have a few close friends and somehow, things have just clicked with them with not much effort on my part. Having said that, most of my friends are extroverted or at least able to take that first step better than me...

Red Handed said...

One cose friend is all you need to make your world feel bright and beautiful...
That was a cute post!

Soumya said...

One friend is all you need :)

Meet me, and I hope you can add one mote to your list.

Muuuaaahhh <3

D!! said...

Loved this one and it rings true in my life as well!! The few friends i have are the ones I made instantly!

Other than you though..we had a long hard struggle till we found our joy with each other!!

Towards Harmony said...

Totally with you on this one..

Loved reading Richard Bach, must read Illusions again soon!

Anonymous said...

This post could so easily have been written by me! Only not with the same flow!
Reading the responses above, I get the feeling its more or less the same for everyone. While extroverts might be better at taking that first step, I am not sure whether that translates into having more 'real' friends. That said, the best friendships always seem to be the ones where one feels at ease from the start. And, I have realized, very few people can make u feel that way. So cheers to that and long lasting friendships! :)

I guess all great things in life are indeed a rarity! :)

Chintan said...

True! Sometimes, the aura, the frequency,the vibes are just apt and we click :)

Srinidhi said...

@ R-A-J: Thanks Raj :) Perhaps you are right. It has little to do with extroverts or introverts. It has to do with something else :)

@Sinduja: HAHA! Completely agree with you. I was just telling my sister this. I think I am sane after realising what my personality type means. :) Till then it bothered me. I am glad to have figured that one out. I agree. I am going to hold them tight for sure.

@Psych Babbler: I guess that helps no? But my few friends who are extroverts find this process of making friends less tiring and more enjoyable than I do. :) But I am glad when some friendships work out well.

@Red Handed: True that girl :D thank you :D

@Soumya: YES ma'am :D We must must meet :D :*

@D!! No? I think you and a couple of others in my life took a while. But trust me, our relationship is totally worth the struggle :D :*

@Towards Harmony: YES! You must read again :D :*

@Anonymous: I guess that is true. But for extroverts making friends is a enjoyable process. For introverts it is a lot more stressful! :)

@Chitan: Yes. Isn't it? thank god for those relationships! :)

Arpita said...

An adequate response is difficult to frame. Suffices to say :D